When will end?

Good god it been a long week. Studying and studying and studying. I haven't left the house since since who knows when...it seems like a fucking eternity. Djsskskskskskdkkskss idvygbiydtbiutebsiuyb I am going crazy studying. Blah blah blah blah. I can't think straight anymore. I'm floating floating! I don't know what I'm saying?. What's the capital of Texas? What the fuck does that mean?? Capital? Meaning income? I don't understand this geographical nonsense. It's so damn boring. Bounce. I despise that word. Ueyehdnsaksmr. Sjutbrubeyubs...autocorrect can't save me now!!!! Mhuhahahahahahahaha!

If your thinking why Im crrazy its cause I actually took my meds today....big miztake. And I dont even puke em out yets. K. She walks lime a ninja! An no one can stop hers! Kudos. YODO. Hahaha skskl! Lalalalalalalalalalalalalalala!!!!! La la la laaaaaaaa! La la la laaaaaaaaalalalala! Oh snap neighbors. no one can stop mes know! not even the laaws of pyhsics! Nananananan! Nyan cat. thats terrrible. I think I broke the fridge. Noon salsa. Nola, skskl a. Someone's mocking on the dooor. Probably the poolice. nope juss foster. kno here's the apart where I act serious.

"Gabriel are you alright?"

"I am perfectly fine." Man I'm talking fast, nearly a billion words per minute.

"Are you sure you're ok? You don't need to sit down or anything?" He walked into the living room. He seemed to be searching for something.

"Whatever gave you that idea?" I sat on the countertop. Chomping on an apple from the bowl I keep out.

"You seem a bit jumpy is all." Something else was bugging him, I could tell.

"Psh. This? Naw this is normal."

"Maybe you'd better lay down."

"Perhaps not." I hopped down from where I had been perched.

"Are you sure your alright?"

"I am fine." Monotone had kicked in by now.

"You're sure?"

"Would you like to sit down?" I gestured towards the mats. He was still standing in the living room area looking worriedly at me in the kitchen.

"I uh...sure." He tripped over his words. He sat down on a mat. Wiggling around uncomfortably.

"There is a chair behind the desk if you find that more suitable." I offered.

"This is fine."

I sat down on a mat beside him.

"What is the reason for your visit?"

"I heard someone screaming over here and I wanted to be sure you were ok."

"Oh...I uh...I hope I didn't disturb you." I looked at my hands, embarrassedly.

The shouting came after the second attack. I didn't think I was being that loud. I had tried to shake off the effects by punching the fridge...it didn't work and now neither does the fridge...

"It's fine as long as you're ok now."

"I..." I was at a complete loss of words. Was I ok now? I glanced down at my hands....my bloody bloody knuckles.

"Gabriel?"

I hadn't realized how long I had been silent.

"Yes?" I said quietly.

"Do you..." he started over, now looking at my hands. "Are you going to be ok?"

"I hope so."

I leaned closer to him.

"I hope so to."

After awhile I rested my head on his shoulder.

"Thank you." I said quietly.

"For what?"

"Making sure I was ok."

"Anytime you need someone I'm right next door."

"I will keep that in mind." I said wearily.

He made no attempt to move. Which I thought was rather thoughtful of him. He seems really nice.

It seemed like an eternity of silence. I sat up, and he looked at me, clearly confused.

"Do you play chess?" I asked him.

"Yeah, why?"

"Come," I said quietly, grabbing Foster's hand, leading him towards the kitchen where I had a game set up.

"Do you want to play?" He asked as though I was a child who is too small to verbalize what I want.

"Do you?"

"Sure," he looked at his watch. "Shit. Can I get a rain check?"

I tensed. "I am unfamiliar with the phrase."

"Oh I...can we play later? I have a meeting in about a half an hour."

"That would be acceptable."

"Would seven work?"

"Yes."

"Okay, I'll see you then."

He smiled and let himself out.

Two minutes until he arrives. I'm so damn nervous and I don't know why. I've been sitting here trying to calm myself down but nothing seems to help. My heart is racing like mad.

He knocked on the door, hiding both hands behind his back. He smiled when I opened the door its usual scant few inches, he might just barrel in otherwise. "Hey," he said. "Black or white?"

"Are you giving me the option, or are you asking me to guess what is in your hands?"

He shrugged, "If you've got a preference, go for it."

I stared at him in response. I glared at his hands for some time.

"Your left hand." I broke the silence.

Foster handed over the small red box he'd been holding in his left hand, looking pleased with himself.

I stared at him some more.

"You said you drink tea," He said, as if that explained everything.

More staring...

"Plus you get to be white." He added. "I haven't had a decent challenger in years."

I stopped staring long enough to open the door for him to come through, quickly shutting it behind him.

"Come," I said quietly, leading Foster towards the kitchen, staring at the box in my hand with a look of total shock.

"Hey, if you wanna get some water going to try those out, go for it. I'm in no hurry," he offered, trying to put me at ease.

"I must confess I am at a loss to understand your actions. I do not understand why you felt it necessary to bring.." I trailed off, I couldn't think of a word to describe his offering.

"Whoa, hang on there," Foster replied, seeing the slight tremor in my hands as I spoke. "Relax. I don't have any ulterior motives. I just like you and thought you could use a friend."

I stared at my trembling hands, unable to make eye contact. "I do not need friends." It sounded less like something I truly believed and more like something that had been pounded into me by someone else.

"Bullshit," Foster responded, his voice light. "Everyone needs friends. And the tea was just to get a good game out of you."

I gripped the sink trying to gain control over myself.

I became fully engrossed in making tea, I felt much more relaxed.

I reached for the kettle. "Are you related to either of Eloise's parents?"

I got out two mugs and placed tea bags in them. I assumed that Foster would want to try some as well.

"Nope I am an honorary uncle." He said looking at me. "What about you, you have any kids in your family? You seemed to do really well with Eloise."

I was a bit thrown off by that, I took the kettle from the stove when it had boiled and poured the water into the mugs.

"None that I know of."

"Thanks." He said accepting the mug with a smile.

I just nodded, already taking long sips of it. "The flavor is...quite pleasant," I decided, wrapping my fingers around the cup, feeling the warmth.

Foster braved a tiny sip of his own, trying not to wince when it burned him on the lip. "Good," he rasped, still reeling from the temperature. "Your move."

I hid a smile.

We began playing. Foster was a decent opponent.

"What? No way, you could have-" Foster cut himself off as he inspected the board more closely. He only had two choices for his rook. Either way he got my queen in line with his king. There was nothing any of his other pieces could do to stop it.

"Damn it, how'd you do that?" he toppled his king over in defeat.

"With a great deal of difficulty. You have one of the most fascinating strategies I have ever encountered in any of my opponents."

"So when can we have a rematch? I'd love to try again."

"I..." I clenched the table, trying to get myself under control again.

"Sorry," He murmured. "I know I've been pushy and making you feel uncomfortable. Thanks for the game tonight, I had a great time." He offered his charming smile, giving my shoulder a light squeeze as he stood from his seat and excused himself to return home.

He was almost out the door.

"Foster..." I whispered almost inaudibly.

He turned around, "Yeah?"

I was standing in that still, unnatural way again, breathing noticeably harder and gathering my energy for what I would consider an immense battle. "I, too, enjoyed our game," I finally said, every word was a struggle.

"Well...good."

"I am...that is, if you are free..." I gave off a look of complete helplessness. I wanted nothing more than to flee somewhere and hide.

"Anytime you wanna play, just leave a note on my door." Foster offered. "Or call me, or hell, just come on over. I'm not picky."

"I appreciate-" I started, looking frustratedly at the floor. I gathered myself again. "Thank you," I finally said.

A smile spread across his face, he showed himself out.


Gabriel

Damn pills have finally done me some good...haha.